Freedom within Limits
/“To give a child liberty is not to abandon him to himself.”
With freedom to work independently, children develop self-confidence through problem solving.
“Freedom within limits” is a common phrase heard in a Montessori environment. But what exactly does that mean?
The Montessori philosophy emphasizes freedom. Freedom for the child to choose. Freedom for education to be individualized. Freedom for teachers to adapt and adjust. But these freedoms all have limits, especially when we start talking about giving a child freedom.
In the Absorbent Mind, Dr. Maria Montessori writes, “To let the child do as he likes when he has not yet developed any powers of control is to betray the idea of freedom.”
That's where the limits come in. Freedom isn’t really freedom unless the child has been trained in control.
The trick is finding the right balance between freedom and limits.
Freedom
Freedom offers a sense of independence for the child. It allows him to make his own decisions and feel successful in self-selected endeavors. Children love freedom because it acknowledges and respects their individuality.
Without freedom, children become frustrated and stifled. Freedom helps children develop a sense of:
Independence in task completion
Behavior regulation
Self-discipline
Self-confidence
Joy in his own pursuits; likes and dislikes
Freedom in a Montessori Classroom
In a Montessori classroom, students have freedom by:
Choosing their own works
Deciding if and when they want to work independently or together
Exploring works creatively, finding their own solutions to problems
Working independently through problems they encounter
Choosing for himself how to resolve conflict with peers (often requires teacher guidance)
Serving himself a snack when he feels hungry
Taking a break from work when he feels tired
Choosing his own workspace in the classroom
And much more
At first glance, some of these freedoms can look and feel chaotic. After all, we’ve been wired to view a disciplined, organized classroom as one with each student working at his own desk on the same work at the same time. And while it’s certainly easier said than done, the bumpy process of releasing freedom to a child eventually results in an independent decision-maker.
Through freedom, children find self-confidence, independence, passion in their pursuits, and joy. As adults, our work is to restrain ourselves and recognize when and how much freedom is appropriate. It will often look messier than control and compliance, but the Montessori approach embraces that mess for the sake of the long-term benefits.
Limits
That being said, freedom definitely can’t be given to a child all at once and without various considerations. Thus, limits. Limits bring structure and routine to a child’s environment. It provides parameters and reliability so the child can develop a sense of the familiar.
Without limits, children are overwhelmed by a chaotic environment. They’re unable to predict the outcome of their situation. Limits help children develop a sense of:
Structure and routine
Discipline
Emotion regulation
Safety and comfort
Health
Limits in a Montessori Classroom
In a Montessori classroom environment, a teacher provides limits by:
Preventing, redirecting, or stopping disruptive behavior
Giving students two appropriate choices when they need help making a responsible decision
Modeling expected behavior and appropriate use of classroom materials
Calmly, respectfully, and consistently reinforcing the classroom expectations
Removing a child from a situation when necessary
Teaching grace and courtesy
Walking students through appropriate conflict resolution strategies (instead of simply putting them in time-out or forcing insincere apologies)
Removing the availability of a work for the child after he has been redirected
And much more
Consistency
Freedom within limits is a philosophy focused on long-term benefits. It’s not easily done and can be quite frustrating and slow at times. Often it seems repetitive and ineffective. But that’s why it’s a method for the long haul. It’s a character-building solution more than an immediate compliance solution. It helps students recognize appropriate ways to interact with peers and their environment, while trusting them to do this on their own without a teacher controlling their every move.
Consistency is key here. With patient, calm, and consistent modeling and instruction, a teacher has the power to maintain respect with students while also enforcing that students follow standards that result in a peaceful classroom environment. It allows students to get a feel for their limits and eventually trust those limits enough to work respectfully and independently within them.
Examples for the Home
In theory, “Freedom within limits” sounds perfect. We also understand the reality of it. In the beginning of giving freedom with limits, it feels like all you do is teach and reteach; model over and over again; tirelessly remind, redirect, and enforce.
Here are a few tricks for the home that can be immediately implemented on your journey to giving your child freedom...with limits of course.
Allow children to dish up their own plates at mealtime (from the same selection of food the rest of the family has).
“It’s bedtime. Do you want to brush your teeth first or get on your pajamas?”
When there’s a mess to clean up, offer to have the child clean it independently or with your help.
“Would you like to ___________ independently or together?” (For any task the child is resisting.)
“I need you to play/work independently for a while. Would you like to do ________ or _________.”
Again, the key to any of these is to follow through. Your child will eventually discover that you’re serious about the limits you’ve set in place, and he’ll begin to work within those limits.
It can be exhausting. It can be messy. It can be frustrating. We get it. Remind yourself of the independent, self-disciplined, responsible, passionate child you’re raising. And then embrace the process. We’re here on this journey with you. The more consistency your child has with this (in all his environments), the more he will accept and embrace this newfound freedom...within limits of course.