10 Practical Tips for the Montessori Adult
/“The child developing harmoniously and the adult improving himself at his side make a very exciting and attractive picture.”
Montessori: Growth for the Adult
So much of a Montessori education and adopting a Montessori lifestyle is about the growth and work an adult must do. Montessori education places a heavy emphasis on the environment teaching the child. But have you stopped to consider what a child’s environment is?
A child’s environment is almost completely directed by the adult. The child’s environment, therefore, can be considered the adult herself.
Montessori education can be one of those things that once you see in action and begin to learn a little, you obsess and seek more information. The more you learn, the more sense it makes, and the more you want to learn about it.
But a Montessori education, as we soon begin to realize, is as much about adult growth as it is child growth.
Practical ways to Start Modeling
Being a child’s main environment, and therefore his teacher, is a big responsibility. So this week we are going to keep things short, simple, and sweet. Here are some very practical, implementable tips for parents and teachers alike. These are some simple things we’ve picked up from others along our own journeys of bettering ourselves.
Talk clearly, calmly, and slowly.
Not only is it more understandable for the child, but they tend to mimic our volume and tones.
Walk slowly.
This is a hard one, but especially in the classroom we’ve found it to be highly effective.
Vocalize your own feelings.
“I feel ______ because ______.” is a very understandable and mimicable phrase for children.
Read!
A child who sees his parent on technology all the time will desire technology. A child who sees his parent with a book will desire a book of his own.
React calmly when something goes wrong.
Spill your drink? Children learn to mimic our reactions when frustrating events occur.
Try something new.
And make sure to talk with your child about your process and difficulties of learning as well as the mistakes you make along the way.
Take a deep breath when you’re upset.
It’s super healthy for your child to not only see that you, too can get upset, but that you have strategies that help you react appropriately.
Volunteer and be generous.
Children who see generosity modeled will begin to develop a servant’s heart as well.
Give specific praise.
When you notice your child (or anyone) doing something well, make sure to point it out. In the classroom, we especially like the phrase, “I notice you ___________.” This helps avoid the generic “Good job” trap by specifically pointing out a good thing.
Be honest and open.
If our children recognize that we are on this journey of bettering ourselves alongside them, they will embrace the growth mindset as well.
“The ease with which a toddler learns gives us opportunities as well as responsibilities.
“Opportunities because they absorb with such ease the language around them (building a rich vocabulary and understanding), how we handle furniture and objects (ideally with care), how we treat others (ideally with respect and kindness), where we put things (creating order), and the beauty of the environment around them.
“Responsibilities because, as Dr. Montessori points out, a sponge can absorb dirty water as easily as it can clean water. A child will pick up negative experiences as easily as positive experiences. They can even pick up our feelings and attitudes, for example, when we drop something and get frustrated with ourselves (as opposed to forgiving ourselves) or if we have a fixed mind-set that we are bad at drawing (as opposed to a growth mind-set where we might show that we can always keep improving our skills).
“We can therefore be mindful, as much as possible, to be positive role models for our young children, to provide beauty, and to offer kindness for them to absorb.”